Getting Together - Spander fic
Oct. 28th, 2006 06:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
allyndraThis was my first ever fic.
Title: Getting Together
Fandom: BtVS
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: FR T
Disclaimers: I own nothing. They aren't my characters, it's not my 'verse, I receive no monies from this. I'm just grateful to get to play there.
Spoilers: Through mid-season five.
Note: Anya did not return after the Ascension in this fic.
Title: Getting Together
Fandom: BtVS
Pairing: Spike/Xander
Rating: FR T
Disclaimers: I own nothing. They aren't my characters, it's not my 'verse, I receive no monies from this. I'm just grateful to get to play there.
Spoilers: Through mid-season five.
Note: Anya did not return after the Ascension in this fic.
Xander Harris wasn’t famous for his introspection and self-knowledge. He often talked to himself in the “I can’t believe I just did that!” or “Where did I leave the keys?” kind of ways. The “How do I feel about this?” and “What does this mean?” types of internal dialogue were largely unknown to him, however. So, when Willow Rosenberg asked Xander, “How long have you had a crush on Spike?” over coffee one day, Xander was caught off guard. He hadn’t realized he *had* a crush on Spike.
Now, if anyone else had asked, Xander might have merely denied it and moved on with his day. But this was Willow. She was not only his best friend, but was also possessed of woman’s intuition, witch’s intuition, and finely honed gay-dar. If she was noticing something, chances were good that there was something to notice.
‘Hmmmm.’ Well, even when he’d hated Spike, Xander had recognized the vampire’s fighting skill and strength. After he’d progressed from hate to irritated dislike, he had occasionally been distracted by Spike’s tightly muscled body and piercing blue eyes. Since he had left dislike behind, Xander found that he enjoyed the blonde’s wit and humor. He was good company, besides being hot. Really hot.
‘What do you know?’ Xander thought. ‘Crush.’ He looked across the small table at Willow, who was sipping her mocha latte and waiting for an answer.
“I’m not really sure. For a while, I think. Why?” Xander couldn’t imagine that Willow had brought the topic up just for fun. There must be some reason.
The redheaded girl blinked innocently at her friend as she looked at the froth on her spoon. “W-e-e-e-l-l-l...I want you to be happy. So I figured I would check on whether you were satisfied with your life of gazing at Spike’s hiney,” a charge Xander wanted to deny, but was unable to as a clear image of said rear end flashed through his mind. Obviously, he’d been paying attention to it at some point, “or if you wanted some help getting together with him,” Willow concluded.
Xander considered. He hadn’t had the best luck with relationships. Miss French, Ampata, Cordelia, Faith...all rather disastrous. Even his prom date had been an ex-demon. She had seemed interested in him, but had bailed before the mayor could attack and eat his constituents. Since then it had been one big dry spell. For the last year and a half or longer, the Sahara had had nothing on Xander’s social life. This made help a prospect of the good.
Still, he wasn’t completely stupid. “What kind of help? We’re talking normal friend help, not powerful witch friend help, right. ‘Cause Xander and love spells are so not a happy match.”
“No, no! Totally normal-friendly. I just thought maybe I could talk to him for you. See if he likes you back, that kind of thing.”
“That could be helpful, or...it could be really junior high. I mean, why don’t I just send him a note? ‘Do you like me? Check yes or no.’”
Willow smiled at that. “Remember when Jesse sent one to Cordelia? And she checked ‘no’ really big and made copies of it and stuck the copies all over his locker?”
“You’re not exactly inspiring confidence with your tales of Rejections Past, Wills,” Xander pointed out.
“Oh, don’t be such a worry-wart. After all, you actually survived dating Cordelia. What damage could the evil undead do after that? However, I promise to be very mature.” Willow’s solemn expression as she promised this was slightly diluted by the mocha froth on her nose.
Xander reached across the table and gently wiped the foam from her small nose. “Okay,” he said. “I trust you. Just try to find out without telling him I like him, okay. I don’t want to board the mockery and humiliation train.”
“Yay! Matchmaking.” Willow bounced in her seat a bit at the thought. “So, I’ll go ask if he wants to have smoochies with you.” She paused, considering. “Maturely.” Visibly restraining her urge to continue bouncing, she rose from the table and left the coffee shop.
Now, if anyone else had asked, Xander might have merely denied it and moved on with his day. But this was Willow. She was not only his best friend, but was also possessed of woman’s intuition, witch’s intuition, and finely honed gay-dar. If she was noticing something, chances were good that there was something to notice.
‘Hmmmm.’ Well, even when he’d hated Spike, Xander had recognized the vampire’s fighting skill and strength. After he’d progressed from hate to irritated dislike, he had occasionally been distracted by Spike’s tightly muscled body and piercing blue eyes. Since he had left dislike behind, Xander found that he enjoyed the blonde’s wit and humor. He was good company, besides being hot. Really hot.
‘What do you know?’ Xander thought. ‘Crush.’ He looked across the small table at Willow, who was sipping her mocha latte and waiting for an answer.
“I’m not really sure. For a while, I think. Why?” Xander couldn’t imagine that Willow had brought the topic up just for fun. There must be some reason.
The redheaded girl blinked innocently at her friend as she looked at the froth on her spoon. “W-e-e-e-l-l-l...I want you to be happy. So I figured I would check on whether you were satisfied with your life of gazing at Spike’s hiney,” a charge Xander wanted to deny, but was unable to as a clear image of said rear end flashed through his mind. Obviously, he’d been paying attention to it at some point, “or if you wanted some help getting together with him,” Willow concluded.
Xander considered. He hadn’t had the best luck with relationships. Miss French, Ampata, Cordelia, Faith...all rather disastrous. Even his prom date had been an ex-demon. She had seemed interested in him, but had bailed before the mayor could attack and eat his constituents. Since then it had been one big dry spell. For the last year and a half or longer, the Sahara had had nothing on Xander’s social life. This made help a prospect of the good.
Still, he wasn’t completely stupid. “What kind of help? We’re talking normal friend help, not powerful witch friend help, right. ‘Cause Xander and love spells are so not a happy match.”
“No, no! Totally normal-friendly. I just thought maybe I could talk to him for you. See if he likes you back, that kind of thing.”
“That could be helpful, or...it could be really junior high. I mean, why don’t I just send him a note? ‘Do you like me? Check yes or no.’”
Willow smiled at that. “Remember when Jesse sent one to Cordelia? And she checked ‘no’ really big and made copies of it and stuck the copies all over his locker?”
“You’re not exactly inspiring confidence with your tales of Rejections Past, Wills,” Xander pointed out.
“Oh, don’t be such a worry-wart. After all, you actually survived dating Cordelia. What damage could the evil undead do after that? However, I promise to be very mature.” Willow’s solemn expression as she promised this was slightly diluted by the mocha froth on her nose.
Xander reached across the table and gently wiped the foam from her small nose. “Okay,” he said. “I trust you. Just try to find out without telling him I like him, okay. I don’t want to board the mockery and humiliation train.”
“Yay! Matchmaking.” Willow bounced in her seat a bit at the thought. “So, I’ll go ask if he wants to have smoochies with you.” She paused, considering. “Maturely.” Visibly restraining her urge to continue bouncing, she rose from the table and left the coffee shop.
***
When Willow approached Spike’s crypt later that afternoon, she didn’t take any chances. I don’t just mean the stake and cross – those are standard issue in Sunnydale. No, she brought out the heavy artillery. She came bearing cookies.
“What brings you by on this horrible sunny day, Red? You lot don’t usually frolic ‘round the cemeteries till after dark,” Spike inquired as he poured Willow a cup of tea and himself a mug of blood. “Not that I don’t appreciate the biscuits, and all that,” he added, dunking a cookie into his blood and taking a bite.
Willow hesitated for a moment before answering. “I was just kinda wondering how long you’ve had a crush on Xander,” she blurted out. The look on Spike’s face was one to be cherished, as he froze with his cookie halfway to his open mouth.
He closed his mouth with an effort. “Bollocks,” he muttered. “You haven’t told the whelp, have you?” Xander was unique, and Spike didn’t look forward to facing his derision. Spike had wanted the boy in a drained-of-blood-and-left-on-the-floor way ever since their first encounter. He’d wanted Xander in a shagged-unconscious-and-left-on-the-bed way since the young human had stood up to Angelus. He couldn’t help it; Spike found the ability to irritate the poof an attractive quality. Over the last several months, though, be had begun to want the tall brunette in the shagged-stupid-and-cuddled-in-bed-all-night way. He no longer found the idea of leaving the boy at all appealing. He had, however, thought he’d been hiding it better.
“No, I haven’t told Xander. But, Spike, I’ve seen how you look at him. How mad you were when those furry demons hurt him last week. How you smile when you guys hang out. I think even Oblivious Boy is gonna catch on sooner or later.”
Spike smiled weakly. “Maybe not. This is Xander Harris we’re talking about here.”
“Point. But don’t you think you’d be happier if you got together with him than you are lusting at him from relatively nearby?”
Her words gave Spike pause. “You really think ‘together’ is any kind of realistic goal?" Spike’s eyes were vulnerable as he asked, a wistful smile quirking one side of his mouth. Willow didn’t want to betray Xander’s confidence, but she needed to comfort Spike.
“Like I would be over here pestering you about your personal life if I didn’t.” Willow’s eyes and voice softened as she saw hope in the vampire’s face. “I think you should take a risk. Maybe ask him out next time you’re patrolling together? Or you could ask him to dance when you’re at the Bronze.” Willow was starting to bounce again as ideas for getting the guys together ran through her head. “Oooooh. Or you could get him a present.”
“A present?”
“Yeah, just something little that shows you care about him. Nobody buys him presents. Practically his only Christmas gifts used to come from me, and I’m Jewish.” Willow’s hazel eyes clouded for a moment. She brightened again, though. “So, any of those sound like good ideas for when Spike goes a-courtin’?”
The vampire considered Willow’s suggestions. Asking Xander out was just inviting rejection. Spike was the Big Bad and all, laughing in the faces of demons and apocalypses, but asking out a construction worker who might not like him was SCARY. Ditto for trying to dance with the bloke in a public place. But presents...He hadn’t spent a century with Drusilla without learning the impact pressies could have. Though wooing a human would probably require a different type of gift, a different approach. The whelp probably wouldn’t appreciate china dolls or human organs. Still, Spike was nothing if not adaptable.
“I’ll think about it. But you,” he glared at the witch warningly, “will keep this conversation to yourself. No running off and telling the boy!”
Willow raised her hands in surrender. “Okay. This is me backing away from the big, scary vampire who wants to date my friend.” She gathered up the now empty cookie plate and headed for the door. She turned back before heading out. “But just so you know, if you hurt him, I will tie you down on my front yard and wait for sunrise with a bag of marshmallows and a stick.” The threat was echoed in her eyes. She spun about and walked into the late afternoon sunshine.
Spike shook his head as he watched her leave. Red would make one hell of an evil vampire. Then he turned his mind to more important matters. What kinds of presents would win the lad? What if Xander wouldn’t take presents from him? Time for a plan.
***
When Willow approached Spike’s crypt later that afternoon, she didn’t take any chances. I don’t just mean the stake and cross – those are standard issue in Sunnydale. No, she brought out the heavy artillery. She came bearing cookies.
“What brings you by on this horrible sunny day, Red? You lot don’t usually frolic ‘round the cemeteries till after dark,” Spike inquired as he poured Willow a cup of tea and himself a mug of blood. “Not that I don’t appreciate the biscuits, and all that,” he added, dunking a cookie into his blood and taking a bite.
Willow hesitated for a moment before answering. “I was just kinda wondering how long you’ve had a crush on Xander,” she blurted out. The look on Spike’s face was one to be cherished, as he froze with his cookie halfway to his open mouth.
He closed his mouth with an effort. “Bollocks,” he muttered. “You haven’t told the whelp, have you?” Xander was unique, and Spike didn’t look forward to facing his derision. Spike had wanted the boy in a drained-of-blood-and-left-on-the-floor way ever since their first encounter. He’d wanted Xander in a shagged-unconscious-and-left-on-the-bed way since the young human had stood up to Angelus. He couldn’t help it; Spike found the ability to irritate the poof an attractive quality. Over the last several months, though, be had begun to want the tall brunette in the shagged-stupid-and-cuddled-in-bed-all-night way. He no longer found the idea of leaving the boy at all appealing. He had, however, thought he’d been hiding it better.
“No, I haven’t told Xander. But, Spike, I’ve seen how you look at him. How mad you were when those furry demons hurt him last week. How you smile when you guys hang out. I think even Oblivious Boy is gonna catch on sooner or later.”
Spike smiled weakly. “Maybe not. This is Xander Harris we’re talking about here.”
“Point. But don’t you think you’d be happier if you got together with him than you are lusting at him from relatively nearby?”
Her words gave Spike pause. “You really think ‘together’ is any kind of realistic goal?" Spike’s eyes were vulnerable as he asked, a wistful smile quirking one side of his mouth. Willow didn’t want to betray Xander’s confidence, but she needed to comfort Spike.
“Like I would be over here pestering you about your personal life if I didn’t.” Willow’s eyes and voice softened as she saw hope in the vampire’s face. “I think you should take a risk. Maybe ask him out next time you’re patrolling together? Or you could ask him to dance when you’re at the Bronze.” Willow was starting to bounce again as ideas for getting the guys together ran through her head. “Oooooh. Or you could get him a present.”
“A present?”
“Yeah, just something little that shows you care about him. Nobody buys him presents. Practically his only Christmas gifts used to come from me, and I’m Jewish.” Willow’s hazel eyes clouded for a moment. She brightened again, though. “So, any of those sound like good ideas for when Spike goes a-courtin’?”
The vampire considered Willow’s suggestions. Asking Xander out was just inviting rejection. Spike was the Big Bad and all, laughing in the faces of demons and apocalypses, but asking out a construction worker who might not like him was SCARY. Ditto for trying to dance with the bloke in a public place. But presents...He hadn’t spent a century with Drusilla without learning the impact pressies could have. Though wooing a human would probably require a different type of gift, a different approach. The whelp probably wouldn’t appreciate china dolls or human organs. Still, Spike was nothing if not adaptable.
“I’ll think about it. But you,” he glared at the witch warningly, “will keep this conversation to yourself. No running off and telling the boy!”
Willow raised her hands in surrender. “Okay. This is me backing away from the big, scary vampire who wants to date my friend.” She gathered up the now empty cookie plate and headed for the door. She turned back before heading out. “But just so you know, if you hurt him, I will tie you down on my front yard and wait for sunrise with a bag of marshmallows and a stick.” The threat was echoed in her eyes. She spun about and walked into the late afternoon sunshine.
Spike shook his head as he watched her leave. Red would make one hell of an evil vampire. Then he turned his mind to more important matters. What kinds of presents would win the lad? What if Xander wouldn’t take presents from him? Time for a plan.
***
Willow had thought about what she was going to say to Xander when she saw him. He knew she went to see Spike, so she couldn’t just claim to have never talked to him. But Spike had specifically asked that she not reveal what they had discussed to Xander. Grrrr. Willow really hated lying to her friends. This called for creative evasion strategies.
“So?” Xander asked, brown hair flopping into his equally brown eyes as he slid onto the couch next to her at the research meeting the next evening.
“Hmmm?” Willow looked up from a large tome on Tlatoani demons, pretending she had not heard him. Not a particularly effective delaying strategy, but every little bit helped, right?
“Soooo?” he repeated. “What happened? With Spike,” he added. Drat, she couldn’t even pretend to not know what he was asking about.
“I went to his crypt and I bought him cookies. You know those ones that I made when I was trying to make up for cursing everybody and making Giles blind and Buffy and Spike fall in love – and I’m not saying he would ever need a curse to fall in love with you, but if you ever change your mind about the love spell thing, you know I’m your girl for-”
Xander held up a hand to forestall the babble the poured from his friend’s mouth. “Willow. You know I love you like a sister. But if you don’t tell me what happened when you went to go talk to Spike about me, I will do horrible things to those blue sandals you love so much.” Willow’s mouth closed with a snap. Damn Xander for spending so much time around girls that he knew which accessories to threaten!
“Okay, okay, I give. I went over, with the cookies,” Xander flashed her a threatening look at the mention of the cookies, reminding her not to get tangent-y. “And I asked him if he liked you.” Well, she had actually asked how long Spike had liked Xander, but they were similar questions, right?
“And he said?” Xander prompted impatiently. He had spent pretty much every waking moment since he’d talked to Willow yesterday thinking about the caustic, bleached, beautiful, clever, sexy...Okay, maybe it was a good thing he’d been unaware of his crush for so long. His blissful ignorance had allowed him to think about other things, like work and bills, which now seemed much less interesting than fantasies of wild homosexual (but heterospecies) sex. He’d gone from zero to obsessed in record time, and he wanted to know what the vampire thought about him.
“He didn’t give me an answer,” Willow said. In her mind she justified this. Spike hadn’t really answered the question. Curses were not admissions of lust. “But he didn’t seem angry or like he was about to break into evil mockery,” she added in a rush as Xander’s face seemed to crumple in disappointment. “Maybe you could ask him out or flirt with him. You know, test the waters?”
“Ask him out. Oh no! That way lies danger...and possibly noogies. No, I think the Xan-man will attempt to retreat back into the land of denial.” But now that he was aware of his feelings for Spike, Xander didn’t really think he could go back to ignoring them. He had been enjoying the vampire’s company for months; Spike was funny and cool. He rarely talked about fashion or Sumerian conjugations, which put him one up on the fun-ometer from many Buffy and Giles encounters. But now Xander wanted a lot more than a pool partner or occasional drinking buddy. He *wanted* Spike badly, and it would take extra-strength denial to cut through that level of desire.
“Don’t say that, Xander. You know what they say: Denial ain’t just a river...never mind, that saying is completely unhelpful. But, it could be worse. He didn’t say he *didn’t* like you.” Willow offered, inwardly cursing Spike for not letting her just tell Xander that the blonde had the hots for him.
Before they could discuss the non-relationship any further, their gossip fest was interrupted by the arrival of its main character. Spike came through the front door carrying two grocery bags. He smirked at Willow and Xander. “And how are the Slayer’s indentured servants tonight?” Giles came down the stairs, drawing Spike’s attention. “Oi, Watcher! I went to the store like you asked, like a bloody little errand boy. Now pay up!”
Giles rolled his eyes at Spike as he pulled out his wallet. “Here is the money. You’ll find the blood in the refrigerator.” He took one of the bags from the vampire and began rummaging through it. “I certainly did not request this!” he protested, pulling a box of Count Chocula out of the bag.
“That one’s mine.” Spike took the box and moved to join Willow and Xander.
“The breakfast of champions,” Xander quipped, smiling as Spike sat down and opened the box.
“Too right! One, chocolate,” Spike said, ticking off points on his fingers as he munched on a handful of dry cereal. “Two, they have a vampire on the box, showing excellent taste. And three, they stay crunchy in blood.”
“Okay, the blood thing makes me squick, but otherwise I’m right there with you. Possibly the world’s most perfect food.” Xander was reveling in Spike’s nearness, while also enjoying the familiar pleasure of pointless banter.
Spike pulled out another handful and offered the box to Xander, who happily accepted. “Mmmm. Chocolaty goodness.”
Spike watched the boy tossing the little chocolate crunchies in the air and catching them with his mouth for a moment before catching Xander’s attention. “Heads up, whelp,” he called, and started throwing cereal for Xander to catch. For a few minutes they had a companionable game going. Then, with a wicked grin, Spike started throwing faster and faster. Soon Xander was laughing helplessly, hair and shirt covered in Count Chocula. “Enough. Enough! Uncle!” he cried, holding his hands up in surrender.
“Indeed, that is enough,” Giles agreed firmly, rejoining the others. “We really must find out where this demon is nesting before it can spawn. So if you could please restrain your food pelting inclinations and contribute to the search, it would be greatly appreciated.”
Spike gave Giles an amused smirk and threw one more piece of cereal at Xander. Then, pulling a pile of books toward himself, he settled down to help. Research was not his favorite part of helping the Slayerettes, but it wasn’t so bad. He’d loved books when he was human, and he still felt some affection for them. What he really liked was the sense of belonging that sometimes emerged when they were working like this. It wasn’t the same when they were out battling and slaying. Then working together seemed mandatory for survival. Sitting around a warm living room, sharing bits and pieces of a mystery felt more voluntary. More like they really were a team. And he was part of it.
It was best when it was just him, Xander, and Willow. The Watcher was a brilliant researcher, but not quite as comfortable to be with as the two young Sunnydalers. Sometimes Red brought her girl, which wasn’t bad. Tara was sweet, but she was so timid that Spike often worried that he scared her. That hurt his self esteem in two very contradictory ways: first, because he was chipped and working with the good guys, dammit, and he didn’t like being looked at as though he were evil, and second, because he was the Big Bad, and he was supposed to *like* when people were afraid of him. Sometimes Spike really confused himself.
The Slayer was often absent, lately. Busy with school, a sick mother, and her soldier boy on top of her usual patrolling duties, she frequently just stopped in to be told what to go slay. Spike appreciated the respite, and he hoped it continued after Joyce recovered. He and the Slayer always seemed to antagonize one another, arguing and threatening until the others intervened. Spike enjoyed bickering with the whelp; it seemed more like playing. With Buffy, though, it was bitter and hurtful.
Tonight was a good research night. The Watcher was there, but he stayed in the background, so Spike got to spend time with his two favorite humans. Around midnight they located the information about how to kill the Tlatoani and made plans to hunt it the next night. They called Buffy to let her know she was going to have backup.
As Xander and Willow were gathering their jackets to leave, Spike surreptitiously pulled a small object from his pocket and dropped it in the cereal box. Then he reached into the box and made a bit of a production of rummaging in it. “Oooh, toy surprise!” he said. He pulled it out and unwrapped it, then turned to Xander. “Here, whelp. Always said you needed someone to keep an eye on you.” He tossed the object to the boy.
Xander caught it and looked at it. It was a super bouncy ball shaped like an eye. The blue iris stared up at him. He smiled. It wasn’t much, but it was from Spike. “You know I’m not giving it back, right? Mine now,” Xander warned.
“Wouldn’t have given it to you if I didn’t expect you to keep it," Spike said with a little grin. He turned to Willow. “Walk you back to your dorm?” he offered. “I’ll protect you from things that go bump in the night.”
“It’s more the things that go ‘Die, die!’ in the night that I’m worried about,” the redhead said, her eyes sparkling, “but sure. Who am I to turn down a knight in shining trench coat?”
“Leaving poor little me to walk home alone? Don’t I get a knight?” Xander said melodramatically, laying the back of his wrist on his forehead.
“You are the White Knight, pet. You don’t need to be rescued.” Xander flushed at the admiration in Spike’s voice. An image of walking the brunette home, holding hands and kissing him goodnight at his door flashed through Spike’s head. He shook his head to clear the image. The vampire watched while Xander put the bouncy ball in his pocket, giving it a little pat. Then he turned to Willow and offered his arm. The three of them left, with cries of “Bye Giles!” from Xander and Willow and “Later, Watcher,” from Spike.
The vampire and the witch walked most of the way to campus in a companionable silence. When they were almost there, Willow spoke up. “Umm, Spike? The bouncy ball wasn’t the present that going to win Xander over, right? 'Cause he doesn’t get a lot of gifts, but still...not mind-blowing.”
Spike shook his finger at her. “Never you mind. I got a plan, and I’m not telling you what it is. You worry about your own bird.” They arrived at the dorms. Willow turned to go, but was stopped by a hand at her elbow. “Thanks, pet. For wanting to help.” Spike’s mouth curved in a tiny smile, and he released her and left.
***
Over the next few weeks, Willow had got a lot of amusement out of the Spike and Xander Show, as she and Tara started calling it. The two men (well, male shaped people) circled each other cautiously. Both fearing rejection, they made small advances. It was just so *cute*! Xander brought Spike’s favorite cider to meetings. Spike saved Xander the last slice of pizza. Xander listened to Spike’s plans and advice in all things slayage. Spike gave Xander the “prizes” in his cereal boxes.
From a box of Lucky Charms (“bleeding leprechauns aren’t even real, don’t know what they’re thinking”) came a small red heart. When squeezed in the middle, a narrow beam of light shone from the point. Xander joked about using it to light his way on secret missions against the forces of darkness. Inside, he melted at the thought that Spike had given him a heart.
A week later, a box of Frosted Flakes yielded a key chain with a little plastic sheep attached. Xander raised his eyebrows and asked, “Is this an innuendo about the lack of a girlfriend?” Everyone had laughed, and Xander had smilingly attached it to his key ring. Spike glowed a bit every time he saw it in Xander’s hand.
One night soon after this, the entire group was out patrolling together. They met up with a particularly nasty crowd of Uebel demons and had been forced to split up. Buffy and Riley had fought half, with Willow casting a protection charm. Spike and Xander had taken the other half, with Tara providing magical backup. Despite the fact that Buffy was the Slayer and Riley a trained soldier, the other team had finished with their demons first. Both Spike and Xander had fought furiously, each determined to protect his love.
Willow was pretty sure now that it *was* love. At first, she had thought it was just attraction. She wanted to get the guys together, help them have a little fun. Both had low self esteem, though Spike hid it better, and Willow thought it would do them good to know that they were admired and liked. But the more she watched, the more she thought it went beyond liking and attraction. She thought about it in the aftermath of the Uebel battle.
While they had come through without serious injuries, everyone on the Scooby team had taken some kind of hurt. Bruises and scrapes abounded, and Willow had twisted her ankle tripping over a fallen demon. She forgot about her own discomfort as she watched Xander bend his dark head to examine a cut on Spike’s shoulder. He traced a tender finger over it, then cleaned and bandaged the cut gently. With Xander behind him, working on the wound, Spike didn’t try to control his expression. His eyes were closed, head tilted a bit to one side, and Willow had never seen the vampire look so contented.
When everyone was gathering their weapons and disbanding, Spike pulled Willow aside and handed her a piece of paper. “Red, could you do me a favor? Bring this to the next meeting and get the group to translate it?”
Willow looked at the paper. It was covered in what looked like pictographic or hieroglyphic writing, with letters and other symbols scatter through it. “Is it important? Did you get it from these demons? I hope it’s not an apocalypse, because there’s a party that Tara really wants to go to this weekend and-”
“Willow!” The girl shut up, astonished at hearing Spike call her by her given name. “It is not an apocalypse.” The vampire lowered his voice. “I told you I have a plan, remember? This is part of it.”
“You’re sending Xander love letters in the Scooby meeting?” Willow asked in a shocked whisper. “How is this less stressful than just asking him out?”
“It isn’t a love letter! I need him to solve puzzle, and this will help. That paper,” he shook the hand Willow held it in for emphasis, “has useful information for the Watcher. I just...modified the form a little.” Spike ducked his head sheepishly.
“Alright,” Willow agreed. “You better appreciate me.” Her face lit with a sudden, evil smile. “You guys have to name your first child after me.” Spike looked shocked for just a moment before guffawing loudly.
“Red Jr. would be one for the history books then, wouldn’t she?” He looked around at the dispersing groups. “Now, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll walk my White Knight home and watch some telly with him.”
“So?” Xander asked, brown hair flopping into his equally brown eyes as he slid onto the couch next to her at the research meeting the next evening.
“Hmmm?” Willow looked up from a large tome on Tlatoani demons, pretending she had not heard him. Not a particularly effective delaying strategy, but every little bit helped, right?
“Soooo?” he repeated. “What happened? With Spike,” he added. Drat, she couldn’t even pretend to not know what he was asking about.
“I went to his crypt and I bought him cookies. You know those ones that I made when I was trying to make up for cursing everybody and making Giles blind and Buffy and Spike fall in love – and I’m not saying he would ever need a curse to fall in love with you, but if you ever change your mind about the love spell thing, you know I’m your girl for-”
Xander held up a hand to forestall the babble the poured from his friend’s mouth. “Willow. You know I love you like a sister. But if you don’t tell me what happened when you went to go talk to Spike about me, I will do horrible things to those blue sandals you love so much.” Willow’s mouth closed with a snap. Damn Xander for spending so much time around girls that he knew which accessories to threaten!
“Okay, okay, I give. I went over, with the cookies,” Xander flashed her a threatening look at the mention of the cookies, reminding her not to get tangent-y. “And I asked him if he liked you.” Well, she had actually asked how long Spike had liked Xander, but they were similar questions, right?
“And he said?” Xander prompted impatiently. He had spent pretty much every waking moment since he’d talked to Willow yesterday thinking about the caustic, bleached, beautiful, clever, sexy...Okay, maybe it was a good thing he’d been unaware of his crush for so long. His blissful ignorance had allowed him to think about other things, like work and bills, which now seemed much less interesting than fantasies of wild homosexual (but heterospecies) sex. He’d gone from zero to obsessed in record time, and he wanted to know what the vampire thought about him.
“He didn’t give me an answer,” Willow said. In her mind she justified this. Spike hadn’t really answered the question. Curses were not admissions of lust. “But he didn’t seem angry or like he was about to break into evil mockery,” she added in a rush as Xander’s face seemed to crumple in disappointment. “Maybe you could ask him out or flirt with him. You know, test the waters?”
“Ask him out. Oh no! That way lies danger...and possibly noogies. No, I think the Xan-man will attempt to retreat back into the land of denial.” But now that he was aware of his feelings for Spike, Xander didn’t really think he could go back to ignoring them. He had been enjoying the vampire’s company for months; Spike was funny and cool. He rarely talked about fashion or Sumerian conjugations, which put him one up on the fun-ometer from many Buffy and Giles encounters. But now Xander wanted a lot more than a pool partner or occasional drinking buddy. He *wanted* Spike badly, and it would take extra-strength denial to cut through that level of desire.
“Don’t say that, Xander. You know what they say: Denial ain’t just a river...never mind, that saying is completely unhelpful. But, it could be worse. He didn’t say he *didn’t* like you.” Willow offered, inwardly cursing Spike for not letting her just tell Xander that the blonde had the hots for him.
Before they could discuss the non-relationship any further, their gossip fest was interrupted by the arrival of its main character. Spike came through the front door carrying two grocery bags. He smirked at Willow and Xander. “And how are the Slayer’s indentured servants tonight?” Giles came down the stairs, drawing Spike’s attention. “Oi, Watcher! I went to the store like you asked, like a bloody little errand boy. Now pay up!”
Giles rolled his eyes at Spike as he pulled out his wallet. “Here is the money. You’ll find the blood in the refrigerator.” He took one of the bags from the vampire and began rummaging through it. “I certainly did not request this!” he protested, pulling a box of Count Chocula out of the bag.
“That one’s mine.” Spike took the box and moved to join Willow and Xander.
“The breakfast of champions,” Xander quipped, smiling as Spike sat down and opened the box.
“Too right! One, chocolate,” Spike said, ticking off points on his fingers as he munched on a handful of dry cereal. “Two, they have a vampire on the box, showing excellent taste. And three, they stay crunchy in blood.”
“Okay, the blood thing makes me squick, but otherwise I’m right there with you. Possibly the world’s most perfect food.” Xander was reveling in Spike’s nearness, while also enjoying the familiar pleasure of pointless banter.
Spike pulled out another handful and offered the box to Xander, who happily accepted. “Mmmm. Chocolaty goodness.”
Spike watched the boy tossing the little chocolate crunchies in the air and catching them with his mouth for a moment before catching Xander’s attention. “Heads up, whelp,” he called, and started throwing cereal for Xander to catch. For a few minutes they had a companionable game going. Then, with a wicked grin, Spike started throwing faster and faster. Soon Xander was laughing helplessly, hair and shirt covered in Count Chocula. “Enough. Enough! Uncle!” he cried, holding his hands up in surrender.
“Indeed, that is enough,” Giles agreed firmly, rejoining the others. “We really must find out where this demon is nesting before it can spawn. So if you could please restrain your food pelting inclinations and contribute to the search, it would be greatly appreciated.”
Spike gave Giles an amused smirk and threw one more piece of cereal at Xander. Then, pulling a pile of books toward himself, he settled down to help. Research was not his favorite part of helping the Slayerettes, but it wasn’t so bad. He’d loved books when he was human, and he still felt some affection for them. What he really liked was the sense of belonging that sometimes emerged when they were working like this. It wasn’t the same when they were out battling and slaying. Then working together seemed mandatory for survival. Sitting around a warm living room, sharing bits and pieces of a mystery felt more voluntary. More like they really were a team. And he was part of it.
It was best when it was just him, Xander, and Willow. The Watcher was a brilliant researcher, but not quite as comfortable to be with as the two young Sunnydalers. Sometimes Red brought her girl, which wasn’t bad. Tara was sweet, but she was so timid that Spike often worried that he scared her. That hurt his self esteem in two very contradictory ways: first, because he was chipped and working with the good guys, dammit, and he didn’t like being looked at as though he were evil, and second, because he was the Big Bad, and he was supposed to *like* when people were afraid of him. Sometimes Spike really confused himself.
The Slayer was often absent, lately. Busy with school, a sick mother, and her soldier boy on top of her usual patrolling duties, she frequently just stopped in to be told what to go slay. Spike appreciated the respite, and he hoped it continued after Joyce recovered. He and the Slayer always seemed to antagonize one another, arguing and threatening until the others intervened. Spike enjoyed bickering with the whelp; it seemed more like playing. With Buffy, though, it was bitter and hurtful.
Tonight was a good research night. The Watcher was there, but he stayed in the background, so Spike got to spend time with his two favorite humans. Around midnight they located the information about how to kill the Tlatoani and made plans to hunt it the next night. They called Buffy to let her know she was going to have backup.
As Xander and Willow were gathering their jackets to leave, Spike surreptitiously pulled a small object from his pocket and dropped it in the cereal box. Then he reached into the box and made a bit of a production of rummaging in it. “Oooh, toy surprise!” he said. He pulled it out and unwrapped it, then turned to Xander. “Here, whelp. Always said you needed someone to keep an eye on you.” He tossed the object to the boy.
Xander caught it and looked at it. It was a super bouncy ball shaped like an eye. The blue iris stared up at him. He smiled. It wasn’t much, but it was from Spike. “You know I’m not giving it back, right? Mine now,” Xander warned.
“Wouldn’t have given it to you if I didn’t expect you to keep it," Spike said with a little grin. He turned to Willow. “Walk you back to your dorm?” he offered. “I’ll protect you from things that go bump in the night.”
“It’s more the things that go ‘Die, die!’ in the night that I’m worried about,” the redhead said, her eyes sparkling, “but sure. Who am I to turn down a knight in shining trench coat?”
“Leaving poor little me to walk home alone? Don’t I get a knight?” Xander said melodramatically, laying the back of his wrist on his forehead.
“You are the White Knight, pet. You don’t need to be rescued.” Xander flushed at the admiration in Spike’s voice. An image of walking the brunette home, holding hands and kissing him goodnight at his door flashed through Spike’s head. He shook his head to clear the image. The vampire watched while Xander put the bouncy ball in his pocket, giving it a little pat. Then he turned to Willow and offered his arm. The three of them left, with cries of “Bye Giles!” from Xander and Willow and “Later, Watcher,” from Spike.
The vampire and the witch walked most of the way to campus in a companionable silence. When they were almost there, Willow spoke up. “Umm, Spike? The bouncy ball wasn’t the present that going to win Xander over, right? 'Cause he doesn’t get a lot of gifts, but still...not mind-blowing.”
Spike shook his finger at her. “Never you mind. I got a plan, and I’m not telling you what it is. You worry about your own bird.” They arrived at the dorms. Willow turned to go, but was stopped by a hand at her elbow. “Thanks, pet. For wanting to help.” Spike’s mouth curved in a tiny smile, and he released her and left.
***
Over the next few weeks, Willow had got a lot of amusement out of the Spike and Xander Show, as she and Tara started calling it. The two men (well, male shaped people) circled each other cautiously. Both fearing rejection, they made small advances. It was just so *cute*! Xander brought Spike’s favorite cider to meetings. Spike saved Xander the last slice of pizza. Xander listened to Spike’s plans and advice in all things slayage. Spike gave Xander the “prizes” in his cereal boxes.
From a box of Lucky Charms (“bleeding leprechauns aren’t even real, don’t know what they’re thinking”) came a small red heart. When squeezed in the middle, a narrow beam of light shone from the point. Xander joked about using it to light his way on secret missions against the forces of darkness. Inside, he melted at the thought that Spike had given him a heart.
A week later, a box of Frosted Flakes yielded a key chain with a little plastic sheep attached. Xander raised his eyebrows and asked, “Is this an innuendo about the lack of a girlfriend?” Everyone had laughed, and Xander had smilingly attached it to his key ring. Spike glowed a bit every time he saw it in Xander’s hand.
One night soon after this, the entire group was out patrolling together. They met up with a particularly nasty crowd of Uebel demons and had been forced to split up. Buffy and Riley had fought half, with Willow casting a protection charm. Spike and Xander had taken the other half, with Tara providing magical backup. Despite the fact that Buffy was the Slayer and Riley a trained soldier, the other team had finished with their demons first. Both Spike and Xander had fought furiously, each determined to protect his love.
Willow was pretty sure now that it *was* love. At first, she had thought it was just attraction. She wanted to get the guys together, help them have a little fun. Both had low self esteem, though Spike hid it better, and Willow thought it would do them good to know that they were admired and liked. But the more she watched, the more she thought it went beyond liking and attraction. She thought about it in the aftermath of the Uebel battle.
While they had come through without serious injuries, everyone on the Scooby team had taken some kind of hurt. Bruises and scrapes abounded, and Willow had twisted her ankle tripping over a fallen demon. She forgot about her own discomfort as she watched Xander bend his dark head to examine a cut on Spike’s shoulder. He traced a tender finger over it, then cleaned and bandaged the cut gently. With Xander behind him, working on the wound, Spike didn’t try to control his expression. His eyes were closed, head tilted a bit to one side, and Willow had never seen the vampire look so contented.
When everyone was gathering their weapons and disbanding, Spike pulled Willow aside and handed her a piece of paper. “Red, could you do me a favor? Bring this to the next meeting and get the group to translate it?”
Willow looked at the paper. It was covered in what looked like pictographic or hieroglyphic writing, with letters and other symbols scatter through it. “Is it important? Did you get it from these demons? I hope it’s not an apocalypse, because there’s a party that Tara really wants to go to this weekend and-”
“Willow!” The girl shut up, astonished at hearing Spike call her by her given name. “It is not an apocalypse.” The vampire lowered his voice. “I told you I have a plan, remember? This is part of it.”
“You’re sending Xander love letters in the Scooby meeting?” Willow asked in a shocked whisper. “How is this less stressful than just asking him out?”
“It isn’t a love letter! I need him to solve puzzle, and this will help. That paper,” he shook the hand Willow held it in for emphasis, “has useful information for the Watcher. I just...modified the form a little.” Spike ducked his head sheepishly.
“Alright,” Willow agreed. “You better appreciate me.” Her face lit with a sudden, evil smile. “You guys have to name your first child after me.” Spike looked shocked for just a moment before guffawing loudly.
“Red Jr. would be one for the history books then, wouldn’t she?” He looked around at the dispersing groups. “Now, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll walk my White Knight home and watch some telly with him.”
***
The next meeting took place in the Magic Box a few nights later. Xander was sitting at a table, idly flipping through a treatise on mystical artwork. Next to him, Willow was working on her laptop while Tara leaned close to her, watching the screen. Xander glanced over at them and smiled at the picture they made. Tara’s hair fell over Willow’s shoulder, mingling with the red that already lay there.
Xander was suddenly jealous. He wanted that. He wanted to be able to touch Spike just because he felt like it. He wanted to feel loved and comfortable in the way the girls obviously did. He’d been trying to show Spike how he felt about him in little ways, but that seemed to be taking too long. Maybe it was time to make a real move.
A commotion at the door jarred Xander out of his musings. Spike and Buffy had arrived at the same time, and were shoving at each other, each determined to enter first. They had been glaring at one another, but when Spike looked into the room, his expression softened. He stepped back and allowed Buffy to pass, then headed to the table where Xander and the witches were sitting.
“Hello, lovelies,” he said. Willow smiled at his phrasing. To those who didn’t know better, his comment would appear to be aimed at herself and Tara. But the redhead had seen Spike’s gaze flick over Xander as he spoke, and knew he was including the boy as a ‘lovely.’
Giles arrived from the training room and called the meeting to order. “I have some prophecies that we need to examine, but they don’t appear to be urgent. Have any of you encountered problems that need to be addressed first?” He asked the young people.
With a quick glance at Spike, Willow pulled out the paper he had given her. “I don’t know what it is,” she said, “but I found this tucked in a manuscript. I thought we could decode it.”
“Did anyone bring their decoder ring?” Xander asked. “No? Then we’ll just have to do it the old fashioned way.” He turned his attention to the task at hand. Xander tried tackling the code as a cryptogram. Giles and Tara looked through books of pictorial languages, looking for a match. Willow looked for symbolic meanings behind the various images used. And Spike appeared to be rearranging the pictures, trying to read them in columns or backwards, to see if they made any more sense that way.
Xander took advantage of Spike’s concentration to stare at him. He was so beautiful. Xander felt a wave of sadness sweep over him. There was no way a guy as drool-worthy as Spike was going to want him. Just then, Spike looked up and caught Xander looking at him. The vampire smiled when their eyes met. And Xander suddenly felt much better. A yelp from his other side pulled his gaze away from Spike and toward Willow.
“Got it! I got it! It isn’t a language. Well, I mean it is a language, because it’s English and that is a language, but it isn’t a different language.”
Buffy looked confused, “So what is it, then, Will? It sure doesn’t look like English to me.”
“It’s a rebus!” She exclaimed. Giles raised his eyebrows in comprehension, but the baffled faces of the others spurred her to explain. “You use pictures that correspond phonetically to the syllables, and use them to write the message. Here, I’ll show you.” She opened a search engine on her laptop and located a page about rebus puzzles. The page she found had several examples, and the other gathered behind her to see them.
“See? A picture of a can, a picture of a knot of rope – cannot. Get it?” Looking over her shoulders, Buffy, Xander, and Tara all nodded. Giles appropriated the paper and started trying to translate the pictures into words. Spike still sat in his chair, strangely still.
Xander was reading through the examples, trying to guess the meanings of messages before looking at the answers given. Some of them were easy, like an eye for ‘I’ or a bee for ‘be.’ Others were harder. A ewer for ‘your’ stumped him completely, as he didn’t know what a ewer was. What could the sheep mean? He smiled. Ewe. Suddenly Xander froze. Eye heart ewe. He flushed and paled, his heart pounding.
Spike had been waiting quietly. He had no idea if Xander would make the connection and decode his message. Even if the boy got it, Spike was unsure of how he would react. If he didn’t want Spike, he could just pretend he didn’t understand the code. If he was offended at the message, Spike could claim the whelp was imagining things. He couldn’t help what came out cereal boxes, now could he? The vampire tensed as he watched Xander stiffen. The brunette turned slowly away from the cluster of girls at the computer and looked at Spike.
Xander felt like he had been flayed wide open, his feelings exposed for everyone to see. He turned and raised his eyes to Spike, silently begging for reassurance. The caution on the vampire's face answered him. Spike had done it on purpose. Xander took one step toward Spike’s chair, then suddenly flung himself at the vampire.
Spike had considered many possible reactions on Xander’s part. Disgust, outrage, sympathy, tentative interest. He had tried to steer clear of overly optimistic fantasies, though. So the presence of the boy on Spike’s lap, kissing him passionately with a hot sweet mouth, hands trembling a little as they stroked his face came as a welcome surprise. Spike almost felt his heart start beating as he kissed Xander back, wrapping one arm tight around him and tangling the other hand in thick dark hair.
The others didn’t know what had happened. One minute they were immersed in rebus solving, the next they were watching a human and a vampire making out. Buffy was frankly shocked, rendered speechless by the sight. Giles took off his glasses and began to polish them in order to avoid the same affliction. Willow and Tara smiled at each other and wove their fingers together. The redheaded witch leaned her head against her lover and sighed happily.
Xander lifted his mouth away from the vampire who was now wrapped happily around him. He panted for a moment, trying to catch his breath. When he was finally able to speak, he whispered, “I love you, too.”
The next meeting took place in the Magic Box a few nights later. Xander was sitting at a table, idly flipping through a treatise on mystical artwork. Next to him, Willow was working on her laptop while Tara leaned close to her, watching the screen. Xander glanced over at them and smiled at the picture they made. Tara’s hair fell over Willow’s shoulder, mingling with the red that already lay there.
Xander was suddenly jealous. He wanted that. He wanted to be able to touch Spike just because he felt like it. He wanted to feel loved and comfortable in the way the girls obviously did. He’d been trying to show Spike how he felt about him in little ways, but that seemed to be taking too long. Maybe it was time to make a real move.
A commotion at the door jarred Xander out of his musings. Spike and Buffy had arrived at the same time, and were shoving at each other, each determined to enter first. They had been glaring at one another, but when Spike looked into the room, his expression softened. He stepped back and allowed Buffy to pass, then headed to the table where Xander and the witches were sitting.
“Hello, lovelies,” he said. Willow smiled at his phrasing. To those who didn’t know better, his comment would appear to be aimed at herself and Tara. But the redhead had seen Spike’s gaze flick over Xander as he spoke, and knew he was including the boy as a ‘lovely.’
Giles arrived from the training room and called the meeting to order. “I have some prophecies that we need to examine, but they don’t appear to be urgent. Have any of you encountered problems that need to be addressed first?” He asked the young people.
With a quick glance at Spike, Willow pulled out the paper he had given her. “I don’t know what it is,” she said, “but I found this tucked in a manuscript. I thought we could decode it.”
“Did anyone bring their decoder ring?” Xander asked. “No? Then we’ll just have to do it the old fashioned way.” He turned his attention to the task at hand. Xander tried tackling the code as a cryptogram. Giles and Tara looked through books of pictorial languages, looking for a match. Willow looked for symbolic meanings behind the various images used. And Spike appeared to be rearranging the pictures, trying to read them in columns or backwards, to see if they made any more sense that way.
Xander took advantage of Spike’s concentration to stare at him. He was so beautiful. Xander felt a wave of sadness sweep over him. There was no way a guy as drool-worthy as Spike was going to want him. Just then, Spike looked up and caught Xander looking at him. The vampire smiled when their eyes met. And Xander suddenly felt much better. A yelp from his other side pulled his gaze away from Spike and toward Willow.
“Got it! I got it! It isn’t a language. Well, I mean it is a language, because it’s English and that is a language, but it isn’t a different language.”
Buffy looked confused, “So what is it, then, Will? It sure doesn’t look like English to me.”
“It’s a rebus!” She exclaimed. Giles raised his eyebrows in comprehension, but the baffled faces of the others spurred her to explain. “You use pictures that correspond phonetically to the syllables, and use them to write the message. Here, I’ll show you.” She opened a search engine on her laptop and located a page about rebus puzzles. The page she found had several examples, and the other gathered behind her to see them.
“See? A picture of a can, a picture of a knot of rope – cannot. Get it?” Looking over her shoulders, Buffy, Xander, and Tara all nodded. Giles appropriated the paper and started trying to translate the pictures into words. Spike still sat in his chair, strangely still.
Xander was reading through the examples, trying to guess the meanings of messages before looking at the answers given. Some of them were easy, like an eye for ‘I’ or a bee for ‘be.’ Others were harder. A ewer for ‘your’ stumped him completely, as he didn’t know what a ewer was. What could the sheep mean? He smiled. Ewe. Suddenly Xander froze. Eye heart ewe. He flushed and paled, his heart pounding.
Spike had been waiting quietly. He had no idea if Xander would make the connection and decode his message. Even if the boy got it, Spike was unsure of how he would react. If he didn’t want Spike, he could just pretend he didn’t understand the code. If he was offended at the message, Spike could claim the whelp was imagining things. He couldn’t help what came out cereal boxes, now could he? The vampire tensed as he watched Xander stiffen. The brunette turned slowly away from the cluster of girls at the computer and looked at Spike.
Xander felt like he had been flayed wide open, his feelings exposed for everyone to see. He turned and raised his eyes to Spike, silently begging for reassurance. The caution on the vampire's face answered him. Spike had done it on purpose. Xander took one step toward Spike’s chair, then suddenly flung himself at the vampire.
Spike had considered many possible reactions on Xander’s part. Disgust, outrage, sympathy, tentative interest. He had tried to steer clear of overly optimistic fantasies, though. So the presence of the boy on Spike’s lap, kissing him passionately with a hot sweet mouth, hands trembling a little as they stroked his face came as a welcome surprise. Spike almost felt his heart start beating as he kissed Xander back, wrapping one arm tight around him and tangling the other hand in thick dark hair.
The others didn’t know what had happened. One minute they were immersed in rebus solving, the next they were watching a human and a vampire making out. Buffy was frankly shocked, rendered speechless by the sight. Giles took off his glasses and began to polish them in order to avoid the same affliction. Willow and Tara smiled at each other and wove their fingers together. The redheaded witch leaned her head against her lover and sighed happily.
Xander lifted his mouth away from the vampire who was now wrapped happily around him. He panted for a moment, trying to catch his breath. When he was finally able to speak, he whispered, “I love you, too.”